Doppleganger (evilgrins) wrote in marvel_society,

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Why Venom always loses to Spidey

9:40 PM 10/25/07 · I have a fairly steady obsession in writing lists. Especially now as I don't have a car so I tend to write them on my PDA while I'm in transit. Something about walking, and not listening to music while I'm doing that, really gets the creative fluids flowing.

I actually started this list quite a stretch back. To give you an idea as to when, Eddie Brock still had the symbiote at the time. I started it and then forgot about it...probably thought to come back and add to it later. Was just skimming through old stuff earlier today and found it again. Think it's pretty good at its current size so here are my reasons why Venom always loses to Spidey:
  • Being a massively muscled thing, Venom defies the law of physics that states that black is slimming.

  • Constantly tripping over his own tongue.

  • Being symbiotic with two distinct personalities, Spidey sometimes just walks away when Venom is too busy arguing with himselves.

  • The same chemical the symbiote needs to survive can be found in chocolate...and as a chocoholic myself I can attest to the fact we can be buzzing happily to a degree we can't even think of violence.

  • Keeps slipping in his own drool.

  • Venom doesn't actually have spider powers, just simulated ones provided by the symbiote, and is therefore not as cool.

  • Venom's a bad guy who thinks he's a good guy and has adopted a twisted moral code. Guy can't even get being a villain right!

  • Even though the symbiote can jam Spidey's spider sense Venom really cannot avoid detection. The symbiote can take on any form of clothing its host can imagine and being bonded as it is...not like it can slip into a washing machine. The stink alone gives Spidey an edge.

  • Tends to bite his tongue a lot.

  • Constantly going on about eating people's brains has put him in a less than popular standing in most social circles.
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